perhaps, if these 'real americans' spent less time wasting bullets and more time 'pulling themselves up by their bootstraps' to look for a job... they could stop taking government issued unemployment checks and oh, put food on the tables for their families. and mayhap, if they want to 'see action', they should do the patriotic thing and enlist. i mean, we do have two whole wars that we are fighting.
as for big brother and dictatorship, no single administration moved us further in that direction than the bush one- patriot act allows surveillance on anyone at any time regardless of warrant and don't get me started on homeland security and the military commissions act. i am not enamored with the way things are going in this country either- but guess what? i don't need a gun to fix that- real americans go to the ballot box.
just a couple of thoughts......
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
useless humanity
why anyone would be proud to be an american is absolutely beyond me. don't get me wrong- i live here and parts of it are lovely- nature has a way of overcoming almost everything. but if you look at the big picture long enough- it ain't a pretty place. set aside for a moment the absolutely unaesthetic, drab strip malls and parking lots that are identical to every community from boise to biloxi or the mcmansions that are so generic inside that you may as well live in a few cardboard boxes glued together--- and look at the actual people of america. that's where things take a turn for the truly awful.
americans, by and large, have no idea what it means to be an american. or perhaps i was sold a false bill of goods- it's possible. i hear all sorts of blather about 'taking our country back' and 'support our troops' and lots of folksy anecdotes that are complete fabrications coming from the right these days. layin' it out in lavender here folks ;) the right wing is full of shit right up to their beady eyeballs. when i look around my own community, i see people throwing garbage out their car windows and cutting people off without signaling after tailgating for miles; i see people setting appointments with my husband's coworkers, only to 'dark house'- meaning simply not showing up as it apparently wasn't important; i see people complaining about not having money for living expenses after having their nails manicured and their hair dyed; i see people using services meant for the truly needy after having quit a job with the government that had benefits; i see people who deliberately take a low paying job in order to qualify for poor folks' new first home benefits; etc.,
i could keep going- you get the picture.
and i see people waving the flag and singing to jesus while strapping on bombs and guns and planning on wiping out innocent folks and their families- whether they be cops or family services providers. i see parents so disconnected with their offspring that they don't know- or don't care that their children are abusing and bullying other's children to death. i see people who consistently put profit over people and i see people deliberately obstructing anything that didn't come from their political platform--- on the basis that it must be bad- it's an idea from 'them'- i see a country so polarly divided ideologically that it's simply a matter of time before shots are fired and martial law is forced---- in order to give them a tangible excuse for their hatred.
i was taught that americans had generosity of spirit; compassion for people who had less than them- whether it be democracy or basic human necessities; i was taught that americans had independent, 'can do' spirit and were the action taking go getters of the globe; i was taught that americans protected their democracy against extremists- and that our bill of rights was for the people; i was taught that americans were brave and sought out the truth and didn't take things at face value; americans were free and we welcomed others to our way of democracy and freedom. now, i am no constitutional expert- but i am an american and i have actually read the document through twice- and no where in there does it say that the right wing is america and the left wing isn't. no where does it say that christians are americans and non christians aren't. in fact, it actually sets up checks and balances against those encroachments that have been eroded away by the republican party and their ilk.
what i cannot understand is how anyone can believe the palins and boehners and limbaughs. my personal thought is that these fearmongering bigots are not americans- although they claim to be. but my other thought is that there are a whole lot of other folks who can't be bothered to think of anything other than going to a movie or crappy service at a restaurant- when their children's lives hang in the balance of the next decade. but who am i to say? i have lived most of my life insulated from the culture at large- and i have no children of my own to worry about. should i be bothered to worry about yours?
i see this amongst my acquaintances, friends, family members, and total strangers on the street- and the only thing i can figure out to do is to hunker down and stay as clear from them as i can. and make sure i have a really good security system.....
americans, by and large, have no idea what it means to be an american. or perhaps i was sold a false bill of goods- it's possible. i hear all sorts of blather about 'taking our country back' and 'support our troops' and lots of folksy anecdotes that are complete fabrications coming from the right these days. layin' it out in lavender here folks ;) the right wing is full of shit right up to their beady eyeballs. when i look around my own community, i see people throwing garbage out their car windows and cutting people off without signaling after tailgating for miles; i see people setting appointments with my husband's coworkers, only to 'dark house'- meaning simply not showing up as it apparently wasn't important; i see people complaining about not having money for living expenses after having their nails manicured and their hair dyed; i see people using services meant for the truly needy after having quit a job with the government that had benefits; i see people who deliberately take a low paying job in order to qualify for poor folks' new first home benefits; etc.,
i could keep going- you get the picture.
and i see people waving the flag and singing to jesus while strapping on bombs and guns and planning on wiping out innocent folks and their families- whether they be cops or family services providers. i see parents so disconnected with their offspring that they don't know- or don't care that their children are abusing and bullying other's children to death. i see people who consistently put profit over people and i see people deliberately obstructing anything that didn't come from their political platform--- on the basis that it must be bad- it's an idea from 'them'- i see a country so polarly divided ideologically that it's simply a matter of time before shots are fired and martial law is forced---- in order to give them a tangible excuse for their hatred.
i was taught that americans had generosity of spirit; compassion for people who had less than them- whether it be democracy or basic human necessities; i was taught that americans had independent, 'can do' spirit and were the action taking go getters of the globe; i was taught that americans protected their democracy against extremists- and that our bill of rights was for the people; i was taught that americans were brave and sought out the truth and didn't take things at face value; americans were free and we welcomed others to our way of democracy and freedom. now, i am no constitutional expert- but i am an american and i have actually read the document through twice- and no where in there does it say that the right wing is america and the left wing isn't. no where does it say that christians are americans and non christians aren't. in fact, it actually sets up checks and balances against those encroachments that have been eroded away by the republican party and their ilk.
what i cannot understand is how anyone can believe the palins and boehners and limbaughs. my personal thought is that these fearmongering bigots are not americans- although they claim to be. but my other thought is that there are a whole lot of other folks who can't be bothered to think of anything other than going to a movie or crappy service at a restaurant- when their children's lives hang in the balance of the next decade. but who am i to say? i have lived most of my life insulated from the culture at large- and i have no children of my own to worry about. should i be bothered to worry about yours?
i see this amongst my acquaintances, friends, family members, and total strangers on the street- and the only thing i can figure out to do is to hunker down and stay as clear from them as i can. and make sure i have a really good security system.....
back into the fray?
i thought about getting back into the fray- i mean really- right wing christian militia groups and bullying kids to death in american schools while the right wing darlings deny stoking up hate rhetoric while calling for revolution in order to 'take back their country'- i mean that's juicy stuff. take back their country from whom?
fellow americans...
just sayin'....
fellow americans...
just sayin'....
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
illusions
of grandeur and whatever else- i ain't got 'em anymore. i haven't been around much on any blogs- i just haven't had much to say. i know, it's shocking- but it really is true. perhaps with the advent of spring i will be more chatty- but i can't say ;)
i have been doing quite a bit of soul searching and thinking though. i think it's good to reflect and do some inner work once in awhile. unfortunately, in the throes of winter- it can turn to brooding- which is where i have been. so, the sun shines and i am on the path to a better mood :) mom and i have been turning some things over as we come upon current events of interest- and i have decided that many in my generation- generation x as we have been dubbed- are pretty much useless. yep. many boomers are too but at least that generation had its share of volunteers and general do gooders out of the liberal hippies. the 'me' generation of the 1980's- well, that's pretty much what we are. how can i get what i want? how can this situation maximize benefits for me? how am i going to get my suv into the mcmansion i just had to have?
yep. i graduated from a class of i guess 280 kids or so- i would love to see how many of them don't have their heads stuck up their asses and who are looking progressively towards the future for their children. or themselves even. i know quite a few of my peers who have never married- perhaps because they couldn't see past themselves to find the right person? not for me to say...
i know a handful of folks from my high school days and a few are good souls- i could rake a few over the coals but what good would that do? they have live roughly 38 years on the planet and haven't changed much in that time- or at least the 20 odd years i have known them. i really hope that the current generation unplug from their ipods and take a break from tweeting long enough to see that we have generally fucked things up on this planet and far from having an ever easier time of it- it is going to get rough right quick. technology isn't the cure all for everything and indeed, as i well know, is distracting. we cannot sustain our way of doing things- and i am not simply talking energy- more importantly, growing food and using water as we have over the last 100 years or so.
generation x is in active denial- i just hope that their kids- or nieces and nephews or whoever- aren't.....
i have been doing quite a bit of soul searching and thinking though. i think it's good to reflect and do some inner work once in awhile. unfortunately, in the throes of winter- it can turn to brooding- which is where i have been. so, the sun shines and i am on the path to a better mood :) mom and i have been turning some things over as we come upon current events of interest- and i have decided that many in my generation- generation x as we have been dubbed- are pretty much useless. yep. many boomers are too but at least that generation had its share of volunteers and general do gooders out of the liberal hippies. the 'me' generation of the 1980's- well, that's pretty much what we are. how can i get what i want? how can this situation maximize benefits for me? how am i going to get my suv into the mcmansion i just had to have?
yep. i graduated from a class of i guess 280 kids or so- i would love to see how many of them don't have their heads stuck up their asses and who are looking progressively towards the future for their children. or themselves even. i know quite a few of my peers who have never married- perhaps because they couldn't see past themselves to find the right person? not for me to say...
i know a handful of folks from my high school days and a few are good souls- i could rake a few over the coals but what good would that do? they have live roughly 38 years on the planet and haven't changed much in that time- or at least the 20 odd years i have known them. i really hope that the current generation unplug from their ipods and take a break from tweeting long enough to see that we have generally fucked things up on this planet and far from having an ever easier time of it- it is going to get rough right quick. technology isn't the cure all for everything and indeed, as i well know, is distracting. we cannot sustain our way of doing things- and i am not simply talking energy- more importantly, growing food and using water as we have over the last 100 years or so.
generation x is in active denial- i just hope that their kids- or nieces and nephews or whoever- aren't.....
my morning cuppa
i love me some morning cuppa with a splash of active denial from folks i chat with on facebook :) yep... gotta go get some toast to wash it down.... but hey, spring has almost sprung here in the northeast and soon i will be starting my seeds....
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
'of thee i sing'
i watched 'sons of anarchy' last night with hubby on the netflix. we seem to be drawn to gritty dramas like that- we also enjoyed 'deadwood' and 'the shield'. what struck me- i was rooting for the bad guys. now, i am sure that's what the writers intended- as they make the bad guys partially good and the good guys- well, bad. the atf agent is played quite well by ally walker and she gave me much to think about in this age of border wars with canada and mexico- and the fact that we still have the odious guantanamo bay.
what is it in the american psyche that allows the dissonance between innocent until proven guilty and gleefully watching someone arrested and tased on 'cops'? from the nightly news to the dozen or so 'law and order' episodes to the ads on the sidebar on facebook calling for fbi applicants, our nation has become a police state. oh, most of us don't believe so- but in america, we hold people without legal counsel and we trick them into talking without one. i am most definitely not pro death penalty- not because some of these folks who did indeed commit heinous crimes shouldn't pay the ultimate price--- but because our track record with jailing innocent folks isn't good.
our justice system is beyond flawed- when you have the patriot act and the military commissions act and hundreds of other laws on the books like the draconian 'three strikes and you get life' laws- well, appeal is tough. and if you do the crime, i absolutely believe that you should do the time. i guess i just have an outmoded sense of justice- i believe that if you are innocent you should be set free.
and, i don't see things in black and white. i see myself sitting in that chair- and know that i wouldn't want to be interrogated for hours on end without my legal counsel or forced into a van in the middle of the night to be spirited away while my loved ones didn't know where i was. guilt isn't supposed to be proven in the streets by arresting agents or officers- or in an hour's time on a tv show. but it is- and america is not a land of liberty.
what is it in the american psyche that allows the dissonance between innocent until proven guilty and gleefully watching someone arrested and tased on 'cops'? from the nightly news to the dozen or so 'law and order' episodes to the ads on the sidebar on facebook calling for fbi applicants, our nation has become a police state. oh, most of us don't believe so- but in america, we hold people without legal counsel and we trick them into talking without one. i am most definitely not pro death penalty- not because some of these folks who did indeed commit heinous crimes shouldn't pay the ultimate price--- but because our track record with jailing innocent folks isn't good.
our justice system is beyond flawed- when you have the patriot act and the military commissions act and hundreds of other laws on the books like the draconian 'three strikes and you get life' laws- well, appeal is tough. and if you do the crime, i absolutely believe that you should do the time. i guess i just have an outmoded sense of justice- i believe that if you are innocent you should be set free.
and, i don't see things in black and white. i see myself sitting in that chair- and know that i wouldn't want to be interrogated for hours on end without my legal counsel or forced into a van in the middle of the night to be spirited away while my loved ones didn't know where i was. guilt isn't supposed to be proven in the streets by arresting agents or officers- or in an hour's time on a tv show. but it is- and america is not a land of liberty.
Tuesday, March 09, 2010
ch-changes....
apologies to david bowie....
i had a conversation with a blog buddy of mine the other day about the rapidity of change that feels as if it occurred over the past decade. in fact, we both agreed that it felt as if we missed a couple of decades somewhere and ended up here. now, in all probability, we didn't :) but it sure feels that way. both of us are fairly adaptable and i, personally (and i suspect he too), love new technology. not all of it will i use- but hey, i think tools to assist in the world's peoples communicating freely- well, it has to be a good thing. and i am not crediting martha stewart for that one ;)
anyhoo, i say quite a bit that the more things change- the more they don't. and that's oddly true too. reconnecting with folks from the past may seem like a good idea- to catch up and to find out what's been going on in their lives and so on- but in truth, it probably isn't. at least in my case. what i have found over the years is that- human beings don't really change at their core. who they are at 18 at the core- is who they are at 38 or 48 or 58, etc.. now, that's not to say that they are the same people- the outside stuff does change- but the values they decide on or that are instilled in them- stay fairly consistent. at least in my experience...
i don't know that i have quite figured out the human species yet though... we are a strange breed. many of us have families who love us but who we don't know how- or don't want to- communicate with. it's baffling to me how many people out there are relieved to move away from their parents and basically write them off and out of their lives for no better reason than they are annoying- or boring. really? these folks gave you life and nurtured you- stood by you during rough times as well as good- and because you are so very busy and self important living your life- you leave them be. nice.
i understand dysfunctional families all too well- i lived in one. i have been fortunate to have at least one viable parent- and i am thankful for that. i see folks from around the globe who have lost their family and/or friends through war, famine, drought, natural disasters, etc., who would most likely give anything to have them back- and we, here in america, throw our families away in the pursuit of selfish interests. haven't wrapped my mind around that yet.
when you look at america as a country- there are some positive changes taking place in pockets- but i don't think you can look at it as a unified country anymore. we are imploding and folks are desperately trying to actively deny that we are. a nation is only as good as the people that makes it up- and i really don't see americans as good people. we are an egotistical, narcissistic lot who wants what we want when we want it and the rest of the world be damned. if we think that you may threaten our lifestyle of fast food and mcmansions- well, we'll just blow you to smithereens with our video game toys so we don't actually have to get our hands dirty- and we can sleep at night pretending we haven't killed anyone of any importance.
hey, if they ain't a wasp- they don't belong on the planet- right? i suppose that's why we can ignore our loved ones with no conscience- and why we don't work to communicate with them while we all share life. it's easy to disagree and use it as a wedge to keep us apart. it takes courage and growing a set to put aside our egoism and self interests and make time for what is really important- human relationships and family. it is my belief that the folks who will survive climate change won't be the wasps- or the western world- we will take until we can't take anymore- it will be the cultures who have a belief in sharing and working together and who believe that ancestors and elders are worth something.
and that's change i can believe in...
i had a conversation with a blog buddy of mine the other day about the rapidity of change that feels as if it occurred over the past decade. in fact, we both agreed that it felt as if we missed a couple of decades somewhere and ended up here. now, in all probability, we didn't :) but it sure feels that way. both of us are fairly adaptable and i, personally (and i suspect he too), love new technology. not all of it will i use- but hey, i think tools to assist in the world's peoples communicating freely- well, it has to be a good thing. and i am not crediting martha stewart for that one ;)
anyhoo, i say quite a bit that the more things change- the more they don't. and that's oddly true too. reconnecting with folks from the past may seem like a good idea- to catch up and to find out what's been going on in their lives and so on- but in truth, it probably isn't. at least in my case. what i have found over the years is that- human beings don't really change at their core. who they are at 18 at the core- is who they are at 38 or 48 or 58, etc.. now, that's not to say that they are the same people- the outside stuff does change- but the values they decide on or that are instilled in them- stay fairly consistent. at least in my experience...
i don't know that i have quite figured out the human species yet though... we are a strange breed. many of us have families who love us but who we don't know how- or don't want to- communicate with. it's baffling to me how many people out there are relieved to move away from their parents and basically write them off and out of their lives for no better reason than they are annoying- or boring. really? these folks gave you life and nurtured you- stood by you during rough times as well as good- and because you are so very busy and self important living your life- you leave them be. nice.
i understand dysfunctional families all too well- i lived in one. i have been fortunate to have at least one viable parent- and i am thankful for that. i see folks from around the globe who have lost their family and/or friends through war, famine, drought, natural disasters, etc., who would most likely give anything to have them back- and we, here in america, throw our families away in the pursuit of selfish interests. haven't wrapped my mind around that yet.
when you look at america as a country- there are some positive changes taking place in pockets- but i don't think you can look at it as a unified country anymore. we are imploding and folks are desperately trying to actively deny that we are. a nation is only as good as the people that makes it up- and i really don't see americans as good people. we are an egotistical, narcissistic lot who wants what we want when we want it and the rest of the world be damned. if we think that you may threaten our lifestyle of fast food and mcmansions- well, we'll just blow you to smithereens with our video game toys so we don't actually have to get our hands dirty- and we can sleep at night pretending we haven't killed anyone of any importance.
hey, if they ain't a wasp- they don't belong on the planet- right? i suppose that's why we can ignore our loved ones with no conscience- and why we don't work to communicate with them while we all share life. it's easy to disagree and use it as a wedge to keep us apart. it takes courage and growing a set to put aside our egoism and self interests and make time for what is really important- human relationships and family. it is my belief that the folks who will survive climate change won't be the wasps- or the western world- we will take until we can't take anymore- it will be the cultures who have a belief in sharing and working together and who believe that ancestors and elders are worth something.
and that's change i can believe in...
Monday, March 08, 2010
Wednesday, March 03, 2010
good grief! beware the ides of march...
so, march is coming in like a lion for me- and not just in the weather sense... i can't say when i have been more mentally exhausted and i must say- i don't like it one bit... luckily, they say that bad things happen in threes so i must have reached my quota by now.
i really need to regroup myself and take a deep breath. things are settling down for my sister at least- she is safely ensconced in her classes and keeping up with her schoolwork and we are putting a positive spin on her crap ass job putting her to part time as a punishment. she wasn't hired for saturdays- and she was hired for the day shift- 7a-3p- and she can work 6 out of the 7 days a week but because she can't work saturdays- she loses a day of work. yep. the woman said to her 'well, you are going to go on to bigger and better things and make more money'- uh huh- in two years buttcrack. sigh. but she is persevering. this will give her a chance to have some time to breathe and as long as she can keep the job- she won't have to look for another part time job. all's good.
i decided to pick her up on her late night once a week as the bus is unreliable for some reason. other than that- and mom worrying- life is settling down. mom worries about her eating and sleeping and keeping the pace. so, i pick up the slack because the woman is decrepit as shit. she tries- but she tires easily- so i do the standing and cooking and she does the sitting and chopping. it works. i don't. and i am glad for it at this point. i have been unsuccessful in my quest for a simple, no brain part time job. apparently, folks want you to do full time work in a part time time frame and pay scale. fuck off is what i say. so, after a mini meltdown- i think i am ok. i have been so very angry at the way shit has changed so quickly- and not for the better. allegedly, modern life is supposed to be time saving and easier than our forebears. i think i'll take the scurvy thank you very much. geez... did i mention the topper was getting pulled over for running an orange light? did not get a ticket though- hubby's good luck must be rubbing off because left on my own- i'd have ended up in jail... he pulled me over to warn me. nice guy. i'm thinking goldmine for them because after i pulled out, two other people were pulled over further up the street. sigh...
did i mention march has kind of sucked so far? i am exhausted..... and tom cat tells me coffee is pricing up.... sigh....
i really need to regroup myself and take a deep breath. things are settling down for my sister at least- she is safely ensconced in her classes and keeping up with her schoolwork and we are putting a positive spin on her crap ass job putting her to part time as a punishment. she wasn't hired for saturdays- and she was hired for the day shift- 7a-3p- and she can work 6 out of the 7 days a week but because she can't work saturdays- she loses a day of work. yep. the woman said to her 'well, you are going to go on to bigger and better things and make more money'- uh huh- in two years buttcrack. sigh. but she is persevering. this will give her a chance to have some time to breathe and as long as she can keep the job- she won't have to look for another part time job. all's good.
i decided to pick her up on her late night once a week as the bus is unreliable for some reason. other than that- and mom worrying- life is settling down. mom worries about her eating and sleeping and keeping the pace. so, i pick up the slack because the woman is decrepit as shit. she tries- but she tires easily- so i do the standing and cooking and she does the sitting and chopping. it works. i don't. and i am glad for it at this point. i have been unsuccessful in my quest for a simple, no brain part time job. apparently, folks want you to do full time work in a part time time frame and pay scale. fuck off is what i say. so, after a mini meltdown- i think i am ok. i have been so very angry at the way shit has changed so quickly- and not for the better. allegedly, modern life is supposed to be time saving and easier than our forebears. i think i'll take the scurvy thank you very much. geez... did i mention the topper was getting pulled over for running an orange light? did not get a ticket though- hubby's good luck must be rubbing off because left on my own- i'd have ended up in jail... he pulled me over to warn me. nice guy. i'm thinking goldmine for them because after i pulled out, two other people were pulled over further up the street. sigh...
did i mention march has kind of sucked so far? i am exhausted..... and tom cat tells me coffee is pricing up.... sigh....
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